Kuni’s candles melted my heart,
lifted my spirit & sparked renewal
along the road to Damask-US

By Ann Hauprich

What in Heaven’s name had I been thinking?

The deep burgundy Damask tablecloth I’d snapped up on impulse as a non-returnable sale item matched absolutely nothing in my dining area or any other room in my home for that matter.

And yet, mere days later I’d found myself at the check-out counter of the same store purchasing non-refundable window sheers in a matching regal hue and with a delicately textured paisley design. And then plush full-length coordinating curtains to frame the ornate sheers!

There was nothing to do but stash the luxurious collection that would clash with my ultra conservative muted earth tones decor inside of a drawer. Out of sight, out of mind. A fitting solution since I had surely been out of my mind when I dipped into my modest savings to splurge on extravagant items I would never ever put to good use.

For a moment I was almost envious of the tightly woven fabric.

Facing a major surgery to remedy a “female” condition I was too embarrassed to talk about, the notion of being hidden away until the operation was over, my 60-plus internal stitches healed and my body could return to normal was tempting. While far from being on the Biblical road to Damascus, this unexpected health crisis definitely had me facing a sudden turning point in my life. But more time would need to pass before it struck me that the way was being paved for a spiritual journey on what might be dubbed the road to Damask-US.

The US stands for Unbridled Sisterhood – though at the time this tale began to unfold in 2018 only a few threads had been woven into the tapestry of my future friendship with Vickie -- the congenial widow of Kunihiko “Kuni” Yanagihara.

It was five years ago when Vickie phoned to ask if she might stop by my place with “a little something” she hoped would give my spirit a lift in the weeks leading up to and following my pelvic reconstructive surgery. Because Vickie, who had then never visited my residence, was employed as head cashier at a local department store, I assumed my get well present would be in the mass-produced commercial merchandize genre. Perhaps Vickie would be bringing me a selection of herbal teas or better yet, some stationery to catch up on my letter writing while “upside down for the count.”

Little wonder my heart skipped a beat when vivacious Vickie showed up at my door carrying an exquisitely crafted box whose fabric cover was an exact color and pattern design match for the Damask tablecloth I had hidden away. And that tears welled up upon learning that the decorative heirloom-quality container filled with heavenly scented candles had been among the last keepsakes bequeathed to Vickie prior to Kuni’s untimely passing two decades earlier. As the evening wore on, the box from Vickie became increasingly precious as I learned more about her late husband and what had inspired her to entrust this priceless treasure to my care.

Ironically it seems her beloved “Kuni” was not a candlelight and wine kinda guy.

But one would be hard pressed to have found a more romantic gentleman.

It was, mused Vickie, a miracle that she and Kuni had ever met, much less married and that they’d gotten to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary together in 1995, one year before his passing. “The only reason our paths ever crossed when I was a young country bumpkin was that my parents insisted I chaperone a date between Kuni and my sister Linda,” smiled Vickie.

Though only 18, Vickie exuded the appearance and confidence of a petite sophisticate – something the globe-trotting Kuni found equally astonishing and refreshing. “Of course, being the gentleman that he was, Kuni didn’t let on that he had any feelings for me on the occasion of his first date with my sister. But after Linda made it clear that although Kuni was a wonderful friend, she didn’t want to have a second date, Cupid’s arrow quickly pointed in another direction,” giggled Vickie.

Before long, Vickie was being chivalrously courted by the Japanese-born Kuni, whose quick wit tickled her Midwestern sense of humor. “I wasn’t sure if he was serious when he first told me the reason he never ordered wine when dining out was that he was allergic to it.”

And while candles may not have been flickering at the time of Kuni’s marriage proposal, the flame of love in Vickie’s heart glowed all the more brightly after the groom-to-be offered to personally design an exquisite dress for his bride to wear when they stood before a Justice of the Peace in St. Louis, Missouri. Vickie’s memories of the romantic gesture will never fade.

Nor will memories of trips they took to exotic destinations where Vickie got to hear her husband conversing fluently in English and Japanese as well as expressing himself in German, French, Portuguese and Spanish. “Kuni was not only a natural goodwill ambassador, he was also a natural linguist,” beamed Vickie. “And upon his return from business trips that would sometimes take him away for weeks at a time, Kuni would always bring me something special as a reminder that he’s been holding me close to his heart.”

Tears glistened in Vickie’s eyes as she shared that the box in which Kuni’s candles had been preserved for nearly a quarter of a century had been purchased by him in Osaka, Japan where memorial gardens that include the remains of his ancestors are located.

While most of the souvenirs were – and continue to be --displayed within the home where Vickie and Kuni raised future international wrestling champion son Masahiko “Marcus” Yanagihara, the box containing Kuni’s candles was kept hidden from view. “I loved the sacred fragrance of the candles inside of the box. I wanted to preserve those scents because they reminded me of the great love Kuni and I had shared. But when I was thinking about your forthcoming surgery, I found myself wondering if perhaps the time had come to remove them from their hiding place in one of my drawers. I felt Kuni would want the candles to bring light to someone who was in a dark place. It gave me a warm feeling, almost as if Kuni was watching over and guiding my hands as I removed the box from the drawer and prepared to bring it to you.”

Imagine the look on Vickie’s face when I told her I had something hidden away inside one of my drawers that I now felt compelled to share with her! It wasn’t long before Kuni’s candles were being lit atop a makeshift prayer and meditation altar in my home adorned with a deep burgundy Damask tablecloth with coordinating curtains and sheers adorning that room’s windows. Serenity filled my soul each time one of Kuni’s candles glowed, filling the air with soothing, renewing aromatherapy.

But God saved the best for last! After recovering from the surgery to correct the “female” condition I’d once been too ashamed to talk about, I was inspired while meditating with one of Kuni’s candles flickering nearby to write a highly personal story that would help to dispel myths about its causes and to educate other women about the importance of early diagnosis and treatment.

AFTERGLOW: One might think a disorder that impacts millions of females from every hop, skip, jump and walk of life across North America would be a household word by now. Instead ignorance and shame top the long list of reasons why Pelvic Organ Prolapse (POP) can needlessly progress to an advanced stage where it becomes disabling -- or even life-threatening. The decision to “bare all” was a difficult one for me to make. However, the possibility that doing so might prevent even one female (be she someone’s daughter, mother, grandmother, aunt, cousin, niece, sister, spouse, mentor, neighborette, roommate, you-name-it!) from enduring a similar ordeal inspired me to endeavor to light the way to ease unnecessary suffering. It remains my hope that by sharing “POP Culture 101: It’s not what you think” on my literary website (https://annhauprich.us/POP-Culture-101_Pelvic-Organ-Prolapse.html), the tapestry of the lives of other women will be strengthened and renewed. Just as Vickie’s gift of Unbridled Sisterhood helped to strengthen and renew mine.